Quite honestly, I don't even know where to begin. I could spend the next five hours trying to thank everyone and still not finish so I will keep it simple.
To our parents, siblings, extended family, friends, church family, and the anonymous gift giver : I will never be able to say thank you enough. You have helped our family more than you will ever know. Please know that we never expected any of your support or assistance - but that we will be forever grateful. We are truly touched by the generosity and encouragement that each of you have so selflessly given to us.
We went into this medical journey with a lot of anxiety about the financial ramification of a situation like this. Living on one income (with no benefits) and having shoddy self-purchased health insurance tends to leave you feeling very overwhelmed when faced with this type of thing. We didn't know what we were going to do or how we would ever get on top of the pile of bills that continue to roll in. We had no choice but to give our situation to God and rely on Him - and He has provided for us (through you all) in a way that we never could have imagined.
Thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. For the prayers, for the love, encouragement, and assistance. I have said this a million times but I will say it again. We will never forget the financial relief you have gifted to us. We sincerely look forward to the day that we are in a position to "pay it forward".
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Diet : week 3 check-in, Mitchell's radiation site
I'll be perfectly honest. I wasn't expecting to lose much, if any, weight this week. I stayed on point with WW all week but I only exercised twice. Not good! I was feeling really frustrated with myself last night for that and next week WILL be better. My goal is to go to Curves three times and do cardio at least twice for 30 minutes next week.
Anyway, somehow, I still lost weight this week! I am down another 3.3 pounds today! :0) So very encouraging. I would have been thrilled with one pound considering my lack of exercise, but three is better yet!
So far, I've lost a total of 9.8 pounds! Exciting! I am .2 pounds away from being 1/3 of the way to my goal. When I put it that way, it doesn't sound so impressive, but that's still progress. I am truly loving Weight Watchers!
It's been a cold week here in Kansas! Brrrr. It was a great week overall and it went by really fast! It's nice to be back into our usual routine again, that's for sure!
Mitchell is doing pretty good. Unfortunately, the radiation seems to have caught up with him. He is now starting to show the external side effects of the radiation and it isn't pretty. His biggest tumor is getting more and more bruised by the day and the smaller one just started showing bruising this morning. I wasn't expecting bruising but sure enough, it's there. Also, a huge area around the tumors is burned and raw looking. It gets worse each day so I'm hoping it will level off at any time now. Mitchell is pretty sore but doesn't complain. He knows it could have been worse, but I still feel sad that his skin is so raw. It looks so uncomfortable :(
Anyway, somehow, I still lost weight this week! I am down another 3.3 pounds today! :0) So very encouraging. I would have been thrilled with one pound considering my lack of exercise, but three is better yet!
So far, I've lost a total of 9.8 pounds! Exciting! I am .2 pounds away from being 1/3 of the way to my goal. When I put it that way, it doesn't sound so impressive, but that's still progress. I am truly loving Weight Watchers!
It's been a cold week here in Kansas! Brrrr. It was a great week overall and it went by really fast! It's nice to be back into our usual routine again, that's for sure!
Mitchell is doing pretty good. Unfortunately, the radiation seems to have caught up with him. He is now starting to show the external side effects of the radiation and it isn't pretty. His biggest tumor is getting more and more bruised by the day and the smaller one just started showing bruising this morning. I wasn't expecting bruising but sure enough, it's there. Also, a huge area around the tumors is burned and raw looking. It gets worse each day so I'm hoping it will level off at any time now. Mitchell is pretty sore but doesn't complain. He knows it could have been worse, but I still feel sad that his skin is so raw. It looks so uncomfortable :(
Sunday, January 16, 2011
We're home! Diet check-in #2 & Mitchell update
We're home! It's nice to finally be here and not have to dread the packing/moving again and to have it all done and over with. I hate having stuff like that looming over my head! It was a bittersweet goodbye - it was awful to leave my sister and Toby but I was anxious to get back into the regular swing of things again and see my parents! :)
The trip went well - my in-laws helped moved us back and that was a tremendous help. Piper was great on the trip home so that always helps as well. When we were leaving town the first time (headed for Texas), I got a little teary eyed when one of my mom's favorite songs came on the radio ("Just A Dream by Nelly", LOL) because I knew I was going to miss her and it made me think of the two of us listening to that song together. Ironically enough, just as we were getting back into town, it came on the radio again and I couldn't help but smile at the irony!
As for my diet - I told myself that this week was going to be a tough one. I didn't have time to work out last week, and we ended up eating out more than we typically do due to the move/packing/etc. I stayed on track with my WW points and made better selections for the fast food (Arby's roast beef & Subway turkey sandwiches vs burgers at Wendys), but was still nervous. My goal for the week was to *maintain* the previous week's weight loss - not to focus on losing, but to focus on NOT GAINING. Thankfully, I didn't gain. I only lost .8 lbs this week, but that's .8lbs better than I was expecting so I'm trying not to get too discouraged. .8lbs lost is .8lbs closer to my goal weight! :)
Mitchell is still doing pretty good. Unfortunately, he does have a slight burn on his tumors now, but nothing too drastic. He's a little uncomfortable and his skin his hot to the touch (and noticeably "burned") but we know it could have been a lot worse and are thankful that it isn't! He returns to work tomorrow.
Other than that, not much as been going on for us this weekend! We have almost all the unpacking done (finally) and plan to spend the rest of the evening just relaxing and hanging out. It'll be nice to be back into our regular routine, for sure. You don't realize how much you miss it until your whole world is thrown off kilter!
The trip went well - my in-laws helped moved us back and that was a tremendous help. Piper was great on the trip home so that always helps as well. When we were leaving town the first time (headed for Texas), I got a little teary eyed when one of my mom's favorite songs came on the radio ("Just A Dream by Nelly", LOL) because I knew I was going to miss her and it made me think of the two of us listening to that song together. Ironically enough, just as we were getting back into town, it came on the radio again and I couldn't help but smile at the irony!
As for my diet - I told myself that this week was going to be a tough one. I didn't have time to work out last week, and we ended up eating out more than we typically do due to the move/packing/etc. I stayed on track with my WW points and made better selections for the fast food (Arby's roast beef & Subway turkey sandwiches vs burgers at Wendys), but was still nervous. My goal for the week was to *maintain* the previous week's weight loss - not to focus on losing, but to focus on NOT GAINING. Thankfully, I didn't gain. I only lost .8 lbs this week, but that's .8lbs better than I was expecting so I'm trying not to get too discouraged. .8lbs lost is .8lbs closer to my goal weight! :)
Mitchell is still doing pretty good. Unfortunately, he does have a slight burn on his tumors now, but nothing too drastic. He's a little uncomfortable and his skin his hot to the touch (and noticeably "burned") but we know it could have been a lot worse and are thankful that it isn't! He returns to work tomorrow.
Other than that, not much as been going on for us this weekend! We have almost all the unpacking done (finally) and plan to spend the rest of the evening just relaxing and hanging out. It'll be nice to be back into our regular routine, for sure. You don't realize how much you miss it until your whole world is thrown off kilter!
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Well, scratch that.
Mitchell's last appointment will be Friday, not Thursday, like we had thought earlier in the week. Dr. S has changed his mind so many times I can't keep it straight. He sounded certain he was going to omit the final treatment on Friday, but he has changed his mind again - the definitive plan is that Mitchell will be getting one extra appointment.
Ultimately, the decision was left up to Mitchell, and he decided to go ahead and go through with it. It's a double edged sword no matter what the decision is. Go for it and risk even worse long term side effects or try to play on the safe side and risk not getting the tumor completely knocked out. Of course, radiation is not a guaranteed cure - there is a 25% failure rate - but it's still a pretty good bet.
Dr. S said he kept looking at the studies and flip flopping on which risk was greater, and has ultimately decided he would encourage Mitchell to add one more treatment to the end of the schedule. There is no proof that an extra treatment will "seal the deal", so to speak, but there also isn't anything saying it won't unfavorably affect the treatment either.
His biggest concern was Mitchell's age. He kept reiterating that if were 60 years old, it wouldn't be a cause for great concern - but he has many, many years ahead of him and knows the potential harm the radiation is doing to his good tissue/joints/bones. Dr S did find one study that said the average age of people receiving radiation treatment for these types of tumors is 30 years old, which gave him a peace of mind. What I don't understand is that the studies didn't say what type of long-term effects these people have experienced as a result so I'm unsure of why that helped sway his opinion - but he's the one with a medical degree so I'll have to trust him on this one. I'm still concerned about the potential harm it could do, but it is what it is. Radiation isn't optimal by any stretch of the imagination, but it's a lesser of two evils here so hopefully one extra dose won't cause too much unnecessary damage.
I just thought you all deserved to know. I'm still of the mind that the original game plan was better, but I also respect Mitchell's decision and will support him in it. We'll just have to have faith that it was the right one and that the tumor doesn't rear it's ugly head again.
Ultimately, the decision was left up to Mitchell, and he decided to go ahead and go through with it. It's a double edged sword no matter what the decision is. Go for it and risk even worse long term side effects or try to play on the safe side and risk not getting the tumor completely knocked out. Of course, radiation is not a guaranteed cure - there is a 25% failure rate - but it's still a pretty good bet.
Dr. S said he kept looking at the studies and flip flopping on which risk was greater, and has ultimately decided he would encourage Mitchell to add one more treatment to the end of the schedule. There is no proof that an extra treatment will "seal the deal", so to speak, but there also isn't anything saying it won't unfavorably affect the treatment either.
His biggest concern was Mitchell's age. He kept reiterating that if were 60 years old, it wouldn't be a cause for great concern - but he has many, many years ahead of him and knows the potential harm the radiation is doing to his good tissue/joints/bones. Dr S did find one study that said the average age of people receiving radiation treatment for these types of tumors is 30 years old, which gave him a peace of mind. What I don't understand is that the studies didn't say what type of long-term effects these people have experienced as a result so I'm unsure of why that helped sway his opinion - but he's the one with a medical degree so I'll have to trust him on this one. I'm still concerned about the potential harm it could do, but it is what it is. Radiation isn't optimal by any stretch of the imagination, but it's a lesser of two evils here so hopefully one extra dose won't cause too much unnecessary damage.
I just thought you all deserved to know. I'm still of the mind that the original game plan was better, but I also respect Mitchell's decision and will support him in it. We'll just have to have faith that it was the right one and that the tumor doesn't rear it's ugly head again.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Last appointment with Dr. Schwarz
We had our last visit with Dr. S today. Well, the last visit with him during the radiation treatments, that is. It went well. He had been considering adding another session on Friday because Mitchell his handling the radiation so well, but he's almost positive he's not going to go through with it. He's administering the highest dose of radiation he's capable of using this week and feels one extra session is too risky. Because Mitchell is so young, he's concerned about what the effects of such a vigorous radiation treatment will be for him long-term. Not only is the radiation breaking down the tumor, but it's also breaking down the good, healthy tissue as well.
Dr S doesn't feel it's worth risking the good tissue just because Mitchell is outwardly showing no signs of skin irritation/burns. For instance, the Dr. has seen studies showing that desmoid tumors need approximately 5,000 units to "kill" the tumor and he's going above & beyond the call of duty at the 5,400 range in order to truly nip this aggressive tumor in the bud. Therefore, he doesn't feel the risks outweigh the potential (but not proven) benefits. I have to say, I'm in agreement with the Doctor on this one - if he doesn't feel it's truly necessary to the successful treatment of the tumor and will only make the likelihood of other complications higher? Definitely not worth it.
We'll have a follow up appointment with Dr. S in 6 weeks (we'll also see the orthopedic surgeon then as well). They just want to keep an eye on things and check in with him and see how things look.
That said, we are completely amazed at how Mitchell is responding to the treatment. He is mystifying his doctor and radiation techs. He should have started experiencing pretty serious burns to the skin weeks ago ... but hasn't. I've seen several people in there receiving treatment who have badly burned skin from the radiation and I have been so scared and nervous for him this entire time knowing his turn was coming soon - but amazingly, it hasn't. We firmly believe in the power of prayer and know that without doubt, a big reason treatment is going so smoothly for him is because we have people all over the world praying for him. I cannot say thank you enough to those of you that have been continually lifting him (and us) up in prayer. It makes a big difference and we can see God working in our lives and in Mitchell's treatment.
Dr S doesn't feel it's worth risking the good tissue just because Mitchell is outwardly showing no signs of skin irritation/burns. For instance, the Dr. has seen studies showing that desmoid tumors need approximately 5,000 units to "kill" the tumor and he's going above & beyond the call of duty at the 5,400 range in order to truly nip this aggressive tumor in the bud. Therefore, he doesn't feel the risks outweigh the potential (but not proven) benefits. I have to say, I'm in agreement with the Doctor on this one - if he doesn't feel it's truly necessary to the successful treatment of the tumor and will only make the likelihood of other complications higher? Definitely not worth it.
We'll have a follow up appointment with Dr. S in 6 weeks (we'll also see the orthopedic surgeon then as well). They just want to keep an eye on things and check in with him and see how things look.
That said, we are completely amazed at how Mitchell is responding to the treatment. He is mystifying his doctor and radiation techs. He should have started experiencing pretty serious burns to the skin weeks ago ... but hasn't. I've seen several people in there receiving treatment who have badly burned skin from the radiation and I have been so scared and nervous for him this entire time knowing his turn was coming soon - but amazingly, it hasn't. We firmly believe in the power of prayer and know that without doubt, a big reason treatment is going so smoothly for him is because we have people all over the world praying for him. I cannot say thank you enough to those of you that have been continually lifting him (and us) up in prayer. It makes a big difference and we can see God working in our lives and in Mitchell's treatment.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Texas vs. Kansas - price comparison of food+gas
I'm astounded at the difference in food prices here in Texas. Everything is cheaper. Not only that, but you don't pay sales tax on food in Texas which adds up to a large cost savings. If you spend $100/week on groceries for your family, you're saving at least $8/week (or $32/month) just in taxes on your groceries.
1 dozen eggs:
Texas: $.45 vs Kansas $1.09+
One gallon of milk:
Texas: $.99 vs Kansas $2.99
Can of generic brand whole kernel corn:
Texas :: $.35 vs Kansas :: $.59
Can of generic black beans:
Texas: $.55 vs Kansas :: $.69
Generic "Rotel":
Texas: $.49 vs Kansas : $.79
Avocados (each):
Texas: $.29 vs Kansas $.88
Loaf of white bread, national brand:
Texas: $1.49 vs Kansas $2.69
8oz of shredded cheese, generic brand (best sale price):
Texas: $1.50 vs. Kansas $1.88
1 gallon of unleaded gas:
Texas: $2.82 vs. Kansas: $2.99
It's a similar comparison for house prices here vs home. In a nut shell, back home, you get a pretty bum deal. Here in DFW, you can buy a 5 year old, 3+ bed, 3 bath, double car garage, 2200sq foot single family home for under $100,000 easily. Good luck finding that back home. Taking a quick peek at a real estate website, I see a few houses in the $95k range with 2-3 bedrooms, 1-2 bath and about 1800 square foot - most without a garage (and much, much older homes).
There are a lot of reasons that Mitchell and I would love to stay in Kansas. It's home and we love it there - it's where we both grew up. But between significantly cheaper housing, much better pay+benefits in his career, NO state income tax in TX, much cheaper food+gas, and no sales tax on the food? I'm afraid we don't have much of a choice considering we'll be living on one income for many years to come. Chalk those up to the many reasons Mitchell and I would love to stay in our home town but can't. We really like Texas and hope to make it our new home in the near future. We just have to wait and see what God has in store for us first! :)
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Diet : week 1 check-in
I told myself on New Year's Eve that I was going to hold myself accountable on my blog (specifically for my diet, but I'll update on the rest, too). I'm the type of person that hates to say she's going to do something and doesn't - so I know that if I make my weight loss journey public, I'm much more likely to hold myself accountable. When I'm frustrated and ready to quit, I won't, because people are watching and waiting to see how it's going. Does that make sense? Basically, I'm going to publicly humiliate myself if I don't stick with it, and that ain't gonna happen! ;-)
Using the rest of my Christmas money, I bought a nice digital scale and digital kitchen scale. I have an old-school scale, you know the kind. You step on and depending on how you stand, the little bar just jiggles everywhere leaving you to wonder just how much you actually weigh? Yeah, that grates on my nerves so I finally just bit the bullet and bought myself a digital scale for Christmas. You know you're getting old when you buy stuff like a scale with Christmas money, LOL.
I also used the rest of my Christmas cash to purchase myself an online membership to Weight Watchers. I have always heard amazing things about WW so I decided to give it a go. They are running a special right now - no join fee - so the price is really not too bad. And there's no better investment than a happy, healthier me! :) I'm in hopes that between doing cardio+Curves+WW, I'll have great success.
When I stepped on the scale this morning, I have to admit I was shocked. All I could think was "surely that's not right! It can't be!". I stepped on and off the scale three times just to be sure. The results ... ?
I lost 5.8 pounds this week!!!
I'm not sure how that's even possible, but I've been sticking to the WW plan meticulously. I've been working out, drinking a lot more water, and making smarter eating choices. I've also cut wayyyy back on the pop intake - and this coming week will be the last week I allow myself to drink any at all. As soon as we're home, it's done and over with. Anyway, my efforts are starting to pay off already! I know it won't be this way every week - and I know it's probably just "water weight" at this point, but I don't care! 5 pounds is 5 pounds and I'm excited!
Using the rest of my Christmas money, I bought a nice digital scale and digital kitchen scale. I have an old-school scale, you know the kind. You step on and depending on how you stand, the little bar just jiggles everywhere leaving you to wonder just how much you actually weigh? Yeah, that grates on my nerves so I finally just bit the bullet and bought myself a digital scale for Christmas. You know you're getting old when you buy stuff like a scale with Christmas money, LOL.
I also used the rest of my Christmas cash to purchase myself an online membership to Weight Watchers. I have always heard amazing things about WW so I decided to give it a go. They are running a special right now - no join fee - so the price is really not too bad. And there's no better investment than a happy, healthier me! :) I'm in hopes that between doing cardio+Curves+WW, I'll have great success.
When I stepped on the scale this morning, I have to admit I was shocked. All I could think was "surely that's not right! It can't be!". I stepped on and off the scale three times just to be sure. The results ... ?
I lost 5.8 pounds this week!!!
I'm not sure how that's even possible, but I've been sticking to the WW plan meticulously. I've been working out, drinking a lot more water, and making smarter eating choices. I've also cut wayyyy back on the pop intake - and this coming week will be the last week I allow myself to drink any at all. As soon as we're home, it's done and over with. Anyway, my efforts are starting to pay off already! I know it won't be this way every week - and I know it's probably just "water weight" at this point, but I don't care! 5 pounds is 5 pounds and I'm excited!
Friday, January 7, 2011
We're in the home stetch now!
We are getting closer and closer to "the end"! Mitchell's last treatment is this coming Thursday. He is taking to the radiation really, really well - he's surprising the doctor and the radiation techs by how well he's responding to it. The techs said they are noticing that the tumor is shrinking but surprised that he doesn't have bad burn marks yet. Hopefully our prayers are answered and he won't be plagued with raw, burned skin after all!
Dr. S is considering tacking an extra day to the treatment. Kind of a stinker, but he hasn't decided for sure yet. The tech said he's considering it because Mitchell is responding so well to the radiation. We'll know for sure (hopefully) by Monday morning.
In some ways, it seems like it's been dragging on forever, but in others, it seems like it's gone very fast. We're thankful to have a comfortable home to stay in while we're here. This would really stink if we were stuck in a hotel or some other less desirable living conditions.
We should be heading home by this time next week! Well, honestly, I'm hoping that we'll be there by now, but regardless - we're tentatively going to be making the trek back to Kansas next Friday (and beyond thankful that my in-laws are able to help us move back).
We're excited to come home for sure! However, I have to admit it's going to be quite the adjustment as far as the weather is concerned. It was 65 degrees and bright and sunny outside here in Texas today (and has been all week). I've been wearing my capris, flip flops, and t-shirts when running errands. I'm not looking forward to the bitter cold Kansas temperatures and snow! I'm tellin' ya, I could really get used to this Southern weather..
Dr. S is considering tacking an extra day to the treatment. Kind of a stinker, but he hasn't decided for sure yet. The tech said he's considering it because Mitchell is responding so well to the radiation. We'll know for sure (hopefully) by Monday morning.
In some ways, it seems like it's been dragging on forever, but in others, it seems like it's gone very fast. We're thankful to have a comfortable home to stay in while we're here. This would really stink if we were stuck in a hotel or some other less desirable living conditions.
We should be heading home by this time next week! Well, honestly, I'm hoping that we'll be there by now, but regardless - we're tentatively going to be making the trek back to Kansas next Friday (and beyond thankful that my in-laws are able to help us move back).
We're excited to come home for sure! However, I have to admit it's going to be quite the adjustment as far as the weather is concerned. It was 65 degrees and bright and sunny outside here in Texas today (and has been all week). I've been wearing my capris, flip flops, and t-shirts when running errands. I'm not looking forward to the bitter cold Kansas temperatures and snow! I'm tellin' ya, I could really get used to this Southern weather..
Thursday, January 6, 2011
"Crying It Out" - why I think it's wrong & the reasons I'll never do it.
This morning, a friend of mine shared a link with me on the topic of "crying it out" - the method some parents use to coerce their children to sleep through the night. I was always pretty sure I was against the idea but once Piper arrived, I knew without question I could never do that to my child. Thankfully, my husband is 100% on board so it's never been an issue for us.
I tend to withhold judgment on most parenting philosophies and choices. I mean, let's face it - we all think that what we do is "right" or we wouldn't choose it. Of course, what is right for one family isn't necessarily right for another family. However, in this instance - I can truthfully say I am completely, totally opposed to letting a child cry it out and always will be. It goes against every mothering instinct within me to even consider it.
I won't post the entire article because it's a little lengthy but I'll share the more important points:
Dr. Sears, someone I look to for advice on various parenting topics when I have questions, has this to say about the appropriate response:
Of course, there is a difference between all out crying and fussing/whining and, when they are older, full on temper tantrums. I'm not referring to fussing or tantrums - I am solely referring to letting young children (2 and under) cry themselves to sleep as a method of "sleep training".
In a nutshell, I urge you not to let your baby cry themselves to sleep. There are other, less traumatic methods of helping your child get a full night's rest without letting them cry out for you with no response. I have several friends who have caved and tried the "cry it out" method and have many regrets for doing so. Not one of them had a positive experience - it didn't work and caused more harm than good. They did, however, have rave reviews for the book by Elizabeth Pantley, "The No Cry Sleep Solution". I plan to read the book soon myself. I had started it a few days before we found out we were headed for TX so it's been on the back burner for a while. It's on my list of things to do as soon as we get back home and into our normal routine again.
Sure, I wish Piper was consistently sleeping through the night on her own without waking. I would be lying if I said I didn't. However, my parenting responsibilities don't end when the sun goes down. It is my job to respond to her needs night or day and I refuse to believe that letting her cry herself to sleep will do either of us any favors. If you don't want to respond to a child's needs in the middle of the night, you might be better suited to have a pet rock.
I tend to withhold judgment on most parenting philosophies and choices. I mean, let's face it - we all think that what we do is "right" or we wouldn't choose it. Of course, what is right for one family isn't necessarily right for another family. However, in this instance - I can truthfully say I am completely, totally opposed to letting a child cry it out and always will be. It goes against every mothering instinct within me to even consider it.
I won't post the entire article because it's a little lengthy but I'll share the more important points:
What are the emotional consequences of crying for the infant when she is left unattended?
Bowlby and colleagues initiated a series of studies where children between the ages of one and two who had good relationships with their mothers were separated from them and left to cry it out. Results showed a predictable sequence of behaviors: The first phase, labeled “protest”, consists of loud crying and extreme restlessness. The second phase, labeled “despair”, consists of monotonous crying, inactivity, and steady withdrawal. The third phase, labeled “detachment”, consists of a renewed interest in surroundings, albeit a remote, distant kind of interest. Thus, it appears that while leaving babies to cry it out can lead to the eventual dissipation of those cries, it also appears that this occurs due to the gradual development of apathy in the child. The child stops crying because she learns that she can no longer hope for the caregiver to provide comfort, not because her distress has been alleviated.
It has been suggested in the past that CIO is healthy for infants’ physical development, particularly the lungs. A recent study looking at the immediate and long-term physiologic consequences of infant crying suggests otherwise. The following changes due to infant crying have been documented: increased heart rate and blood pressure, reduced oxygen level, elevated cerebral blood pressure, depleted energy reserves and oxygen, interrupted mother-infant interaction, brain injury, and cardiac dysfunction. The study’s researchers suggested that caregivers should answer infant cries swiftly, consistently, and comprehensively, recommendations which are in line with "Attachment Parenting" principles.
CIO supporters tend to view their infants’ cries as attempts to manipulate caregivers into providing more attention. Holding this view can be detrimental to the immediate and long-term health of the baby. In the field of cognitive psychology there exists the premise that our thoughts underlie our behavior. Thus, if we think positively about an individual, our behaviors toward them tend to be positive as well. Conversely, if we think negatively about an individual, we will behave correspondingly. Consider people in your own life whom you consider manipulative – how does that perception influence your behavior toward them? It is unlikely that the interpretation of a manipulative personality will result in the compassionate, empathetic, and loving care of that individual. Infants, quite helpless without the aid of their caregivers, may suffer both emotional and physical consequences of this type of attitude.
Dr. Sears, someone I look to for advice on various parenting topics when I have questions, has this to say about the appropriate response:
Be nurturing. Your other option is to give a prompt and nurturant response. This is the win-win way for baby and mother to work out a communication system that helps them both. The mother responds promptly and sensitively so that baby will feel less frantic the next time he needs something. The baby learns to "cry better" , in a less disturbing way since he knows mother will come. Mother structures baby's environment so that there is less need for him to cry; she keeps him close to her if she knows he's tired and ready to sleep. Mother also heightens her sensitivity to the cry so that she gives just the right response. A quick response when baby is young and falls apart easily or when the cry makes it clear there is real danger; a slower response when the baby is older and begins to learn how to settle disturbances on his own.
Responding appropriately to your baby's cry is the first and one of the most difficult, communication challenges you will face as a mother. You will master the system only after rehearsing thousands of cue-responses in the early months. If you initially regard your baby's cry as a signal to be responded to and evaluated rather than as an unfortunate habit to be broken, you will open yourself up to becoming an expert in your baby's signals, which will carry over into becoming an expert on everything about your baby. Each mother-baby signal system is unique. That's why it is so shortsighted for "cry trainers" to prescribe canned cry-response formulas, such as "leave her to cry for five minutes the first night, ten minutes the second," and so on.
Of course, there is a difference between all out crying and fussing/whining and, when they are older, full on temper tantrums. I'm not referring to fussing or tantrums - I am solely referring to letting young children (2 and under) cry themselves to sleep as a method of "sleep training".
In a nutshell, I urge you not to let your baby cry themselves to sleep. There are other, less traumatic methods of helping your child get a full night's rest without letting them cry out for you with no response. I have several friends who have caved and tried the "cry it out" method and have many regrets for doing so. Not one of them had a positive experience - it didn't work and caused more harm than good. They did, however, have rave reviews for the book by Elizabeth Pantley, "The No Cry Sleep Solution". I plan to read the book soon myself. I had started it a few days before we found out we were headed for TX so it's been on the back burner for a while. It's on my list of things to do as soon as we get back home and into our normal routine again.
Sure, I wish Piper was consistently sleeping through the night on her own without waking. I would be lying if I said I didn't. However, my parenting responsibilities don't end when the sun goes down. It is my job to respond to her needs night or day and I refuse to believe that letting her cry herself to sleep will do either of us any favors. If you don't want to respond to a child's needs in the middle of the night, you might be better suited to have a pet rock.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Fort Worth gun show & helping remodel Ashley's bathroom
It's been a fun, relaxing weekend here in Ft Worth! It's been really nice to just slow down and take some time to recharge. Mitchell let me sleep in yesterday morning and that was amazing! I wasn't sure I was capable of sleeping 10 hours straight anymore but I did and I really, really needed it. I've been struggling with horrid headaches again lately so it was nice to start my day off on the right foot, headache free!
Mitchell had the day off of treatment on Friday in honor of the holiday so we decided to run errands instead. Ashley and I have spent a few hours each day working on her downstairs bathroom. She is using Christmas money to completely redo the bathroom and we are almost finished! We just need to get a few more things at Hobby Lobby and we should be done. She bought all new towels/hand towels, rugs, soap dispenser, a new towel rack, a new shelving unit, and I gave her a gorgeous clock for Christmas to match her new decor as well. The new paint looks terrific - it's amazing what a fresh coat of paint on the walls and trim can do for the look of a room! It looks completely different in there and I love it! I can't wait to see it 100% completed.
Mitchell and I also headed out for the Fort Worth gun show early this morning. To be honest, I wasn't too thrilled about the prospect but decided to humor my husband and go along for the adventure. I had planned on taking pictures once we were in, but alas, they prohibited any pictures or video inside the show. Darn!
It was pretty interesting, I suppose. Even Mitchell made the comment that you can only look at so many rifles, hand guns, holsters, and ammo before it all just blurs together and loses it's appeal. He was there searching for a holster and/or a small gun safe (oh, the difference in things men and women spend their Christmas money on!). He came out empty handed. The funny thing is that I came home with all sorts of cool stuff! At least we both didn't come home empty handed! :0)
Treatments resume again tomorrow! He only has 9 more treatments left - thank God! We are in the home stretch now. He's still hanging in there! He has a little pain/discomfort at this point, but still nothing too major. He is entering the worst of the treatments at this point so hopefully it doesn't get too bad. His doctor is really surprised at how well his skin is taking the treatment - he had expected it to be a lot worse than it is by now so that's good news for sure!
And because I don't like to make blog entries without a picture, here's a funny one I snapped of Rio while I was making lunch this afternoon. Her shadow cracks me up.
I know, I know. Easily amused, I'm tellin' ya.
Mitchell had the day off of treatment on Friday in honor of the holiday so we decided to run errands instead. Ashley and I have spent a few hours each day working on her downstairs bathroom. She is using Christmas money to completely redo the bathroom and we are almost finished! We just need to get a few more things at Hobby Lobby and we should be done. She bought all new towels/hand towels, rugs, soap dispenser, a new towel rack, a new shelving unit, and I gave her a gorgeous clock for Christmas to match her new decor as well. The new paint looks terrific - it's amazing what a fresh coat of paint on the walls and trim can do for the look of a room! It looks completely different in there and I love it! I can't wait to see it 100% completed.
Mitchell and I also headed out for the Fort Worth gun show early this morning. To be honest, I wasn't too thrilled about the prospect but decided to humor my husband and go along for the adventure. I had planned on taking pictures once we were in, but alas, they prohibited any pictures or video inside the show. Darn!
It was pretty interesting, I suppose. Even Mitchell made the comment that you can only look at so many rifles, hand guns, holsters, and ammo before it all just blurs together and loses it's appeal. He was there searching for a holster and/or a small gun safe (oh, the difference in things men and women spend their Christmas money on!). He came out empty handed. The funny thing is that I came home with all sorts of cool stuff! At least we both didn't come home empty handed! :0)
Treatments resume again tomorrow! He only has 9 more treatments left - thank God! We are in the home stretch now. He's still hanging in there! He has a little pain/discomfort at this point, but still nothing too major. He is entering the worst of the treatments at this point so hopefully it doesn't get too bad. His doctor is really surprised at how well his skin is taking the treatment - he had expected it to be a lot worse than it is by now so that's good news for sure!
And because I don't like to make blog entries without a picture, here's a funny one I snapped of Rio while I was making lunch this afternoon. Her shadow cracks me up.
I know, I know. Easily amused, I'm tellin' ya.
The Kindle
I really like to read but have admittedly slacked at keeping up with it since Piper has arrived on the scene. Mitchell first told me about the Kindle a few months back and I didn't pay a whole lot of attention. It looked neat and he thought I'd love it - but it wasn't exactly at the top of my priority list at the time.
After Christmas, I really started looking into it. I had enough Christmas cash to buy one and after doing a little research and talking to a few friends that had one, I took the plunge and ordered myself the new 3G Kindle in graphite (black/dark gray).
I was skeptical about it, to be honest. I just didn't believe that an e-reader would look like a book. I was sure it would strain my eyes and feel like I was gazing into a cell phone or computer (both of which make my eyes hurt after a while). But it's true - it is almost eerily similar to reading a book. In the course of two days, I've already finished one book and I am well into another. It really does look just like words printed on paper.
I like that you can change the font size, type, and the line spacing between rows of text. It's totally customizable as far as your reading preference which is awesome because you obviously can't do that with a real book. You can browse thousands of books in their Kindle store and download them and read them instantly. No more heading to the store to find the book or having to order online and wait a week for it to arrive in the mail! It's instant, easy, and cheap!
Most of the books are a better price than what you can find elsewhere for a paperback or hardback book. (I've yet to find a book that is more expensive when purchased through Kindle although I've heard that it can happen from time to time.) There are tons and tons of free books to choose from as well. The first book I purchased was $2.99 and the one I'm reading now was free. As a comparison, George Bush's new book, Decision Points, is for sale at Barnes & Noble for $20.47. You can buy it and have it wirelessly delivered to your Kindle for $12.99. You save $7.48, even off the cheapest book stand price.
Here are a few pictures for those of you who aren't familiar with the Kindle/e-readers. My actual Kindle is just plain black - I ordered a decorative 3M "sticker" to protect it from getting scratched. I also ordered a matching orange leather (lighted) case to go with it which you can see the Kindle resting inside here:
The picture you see on the screen of the Kindle is just a screen saver. It filters through various screen savers similar to the one you see above once you "time out" after 10 minutes of inactivity. Here is a view of the back of the Kindle:
This shows the built-in reading light that comes in the case I purchased. This is invaluable to me because I do most of my reading in the dark just before falling asleep. The Kindle is just like a book - it is designed to look and read just like a real book therefore the screen is not backlit like a cell phone or computer screen which makes it bright, even in the dark. So, for those wanting to read in low-light situations, I strongly urge you to get the leather case with the built in reading light. It's pricey and I cringed at spending $59 on a case for it - but it makes a big, big difference. It provides just enough light to make reading in the dark a breeze. The light is powered by the Kindle so there is no need to worry about replacing the batteries in the light. This shows how sleek the light is - it slides right out from the back of the case (on the upper right hand side):
This shows where the light comes out of in the back of the case (upper left hand corner). It doesn't add any bulk to the back of the case at all - the light slides right in.
Size comparison of the Kindle next to a standard size DVD case:
They are very similar in size, but the Kindle is about half as thick as a DVD case.
Overall, I am really loving my Kindle. I am amazed at the technology that went in to making it so similar to a real book. I didn't believe it until I saw it with my own eyes! The device can store approximately 3,500 books. That's a lot of books! There are lots of other cool features and details, but I'll keep it to the basics. I highly recommend the Kindle to anyone that loves books but hates the clutter. Two thumbs up from me!
After Christmas, I really started looking into it. I had enough Christmas cash to buy one and after doing a little research and talking to a few friends that had one, I took the plunge and ordered myself the new 3G Kindle in graphite (black/dark gray).
I was skeptical about it, to be honest. I just didn't believe that an e-reader would look like a book. I was sure it would strain my eyes and feel like I was gazing into a cell phone or computer (both of which make my eyes hurt after a while). But it's true - it is almost eerily similar to reading a book. In the course of two days, I've already finished one book and I am well into another. It really does look just like words printed on paper.
I like that you can change the font size, type, and the line spacing between rows of text. It's totally customizable as far as your reading preference which is awesome because you obviously can't do that with a real book. You can browse thousands of books in their Kindle store and download them and read them instantly. No more heading to the store to find the book or having to order online and wait a week for it to arrive in the mail! It's instant, easy, and cheap!
Most of the books are a better price than what you can find elsewhere for a paperback or hardback book. (I've yet to find a book that is more expensive when purchased through Kindle although I've heard that it can happen from time to time.) There are tons and tons of free books to choose from as well. The first book I purchased was $2.99 and the one I'm reading now was free. As a comparison, George Bush's new book, Decision Points, is for sale at Barnes & Noble for $20.47. You can buy it and have it wirelessly delivered to your Kindle for $12.99. You save $7.48, even off the cheapest book stand price.
Here are a few pictures for those of you who aren't familiar with the Kindle/e-readers. My actual Kindle is just plain black - I ordered a decorative 3M "sticker" to protect it from getting scratched. I also ordered a matching orange leather (lighted) case to go with it which you can see the Kindle resting inside here:
The picture you see on the screen of the Kindle is just a screen saver. It filters through various screen savers similar to the one you see above once you "time out" after 10 minutes of inactivity. Here is a view of the back of the Kindle:
This shows the built-in reading light that comes in the case I purchased. This is invaluable to me because I do most of my reading in the dark just before falling asleep. The Kindle is just like a book - it is designed to look and read just like a real book therefore the screen is not backlit like a cell phone or computer screen which makes it bright, even in the dark. So, for those wanting to read in low-light situations, I strongly urge you to get the leather case with the built in reading light. It's pricey and I cringed at spending $59 on a case for it - but it makes a big, big difference. It provides just enough light to make reading in the dark a breeze. The light is powered by the Kindle so there is no need to worry about replacing the batteries in the light. This shows how sleek the light is - it slides right out from the back of the case (on the upper right hand side):
This shows where the light comes out of in the back of the case (upper left hand corner). It doesn't add any bulk to the back of the case at all - the light slides right in.
Size comparison of the Kindle next to a standard size DVD case:
They are very similar in size, but the Kindle is about half as thick as a DVD case.
Overall, I am really loving my Kindle. I am amazed at the technology that went in to making it so similar to a real book. I didn't believe it until I saw it with my own eyes! The device can store approximately 3,500 books. That's a lot of books! There are lots of other cool features and details, but I'll keep it to the basics. I highly recommend the Kindle to anyone that loves books but hates the clutter. Two thumbs up from me!
Saturday, January 1, 2011
1-1-11
I can't believe 2010 has closed in on us already! Wow. I say that every year, but this year has been exceptionally fast and I attribute that to Piper. Becoming a parent makes time pass in warp speed, I'm convinced!
It has been an interesting year, that's for sure. There has been a lot of worry, stress, concern, and uncertainty in the year but there have been plenty of special moments as well. Watching Piper thrive and learn new things every day has been one of the great joys of my year. I am so grateful to God for blessing me with such a special little girl. I don't even want to remember what life was like without her! :)
I can't say that 2010 will go down as one of the best years I've ever had, but I know that it could be far worse. Where there is bad, there is also good (hi, Piper!) - and it's good to keep things in perspective! You can't appreciate the great years without a few rocky ones sprinkled in between.
I definitely believe in making New Year's resolutions. It doesn't hurt to try! :) So, my aspirations for 2011 are:
--The "old faithful" of all resolutions : lose weight, get healthier. This has been on my list for a while now, but it's time to get serious. There is no time like the present so I'm ready to put my nose to the grindstone and get rid of these extra pounds! I'm not happy at my current weight and I'm the only one to blame (which makes me the only person capable of fixing it!). My first goal is to lose 25lbs. I need to lose more, but that's a good starting point. Once we get back home, I will be back on the bandwagon full force. It's no excuse, but it's hard to stay on track when everything is so off-kilter here! I plan to weigh in weekly and measure monthly and share my progress here on my blog to hold myself accountable. I know there will be good weeks and bad weeks but I'm prepared to stick with it! I'm sick of feeling self conscious all the time. 2011 is my year - I want "ME" back! :)
--Stop drinking pop. This one is going to be very difficult for me. I've done it before - I quit drinking pop for about two years in high school. I could kick myself for ever incorporating it back into my diet. Pop is my vice. I love pop. It's horribly expensive, loaded with calories, and may as well be called liquid poison - it's SO bad for you! I want to quit cold turkey. I know it will be tough but it'll be worth it.
--Write our will. I want this to be finished by the end of January if at all possible. I was absolutely adamant about having this done as soon as Piper was born but it never happened. No more excuses - it has to get done. It's SO important and I don't want to put it off any longer.
--Keep up on my email "clutter". I've always been bad at this. My original hotmail account (I've had it for years and years) has over 18,000 unread emails. Yes, you read that right. Eighteen thousand *unread* emails. That's not even counting all my read emails! There is no getting on top of that account at this point but I recently had to get a new primary email account and I resolve to do better with this one. I need to delete what I don't need and organize the emails I want to save. No more email clutter!
--Wear my seat belt 100% of the time. I am a big time stickler for car seat safety where Piper is concerned. Yet, I'm not always buckled up. Hypocritical much? I always wear my belt when I'm driving, but as the passenger, I'd say I only wear it about 50% of the time. Not acceptable! I need to make it a habit to wear it every.single.time, without exception.
--Read at least one book per month. I know, I know. Wimpy goal, right? I have been slacking this year big time and it's time to get back to reading books again! I just ordered myself an Amazon Kindle with Christmas money so hopefully that will entice me to reach my goal. One book a month is easy, peasy. Maybe I'll get to the point of being able to read one a week with my new "toy"!
--Read the entire Bible. This is lofty and I'll admit that I'll be surprised if I actually complete this in one year. Mitchell and I have tried doing this several times but never seem to finish. I really want to get this completed this year! :)
--Learn to do one of three things: sew, knit, or play piano. I am leaning heavily towards learning to sew because it's most practical, but we shall see! First I have to find someone willing to teach me how to do it!
I'll have to revisit this entry every so often to see how I'm doing. I know chances are good that not all of my goals will be met, but I'm going to give it a valiant effort anyhow. I have high hopes for 2011. It sounds phony, but I have a really good feeling about what the coming year has in store for our little family.
I wish you all a happy, healthy new year!
It has been an interesting year, that's for sure. There has been a lot of worry, stress, concern, and uncertainty in the year but there have been plenty of special moments as well. Watching Piper thrive and learn new things every day has been one of the great joys of my year. I am so grateful to God for blessing me with such a special little girl. I don't even want to remember what life was like without her! :)
I can't say that 2010 will go down as one of the best years I've ever had, but I know that it could be far worse. Where there is bad, there is also good (hi, Piper!) - and it's good to keep things in perspective! You can't appreciate the great years without a few rocky ones sprinkled in between.
I definitely believe in making New Year's resolutions. It doesn't hurt to try! :) So, my aspirations for 2011 are:
--The "old faithful" of all resolutions : lose weight, get healthier. This has been on my list for a while now, but it's time to get serious. There is no time like the present so I'm ready to put my nose to the grindstone and get rid of these extra pounds! I'm not happy at my current weight and I'm the only one to blame (which makes me the only person capable of fixing it!). My first goal is to lose 25lbs. I need to lose more, but that's a good starting point. Once we get back home, I will be back on the bandwagon full force. It's no excuse, but it's hard to stay on track when everything is so off-kilter here! I plan to weigh in weekly and measure monthly and share my progress here on my blog to hold myself accountable. I know there will be good weeks and bad weeks but I'm prepared to stick with it! I'm sick of feeling self conscious all the time. 2011 is my year - I want "ME" back! :)
--Stop drinking pop. This one is going to be very difficult for me. I've done it before - I quit drinking pop for about two years in high school. I could kick myself for ever incorporating it back into my diet. Pop is my vice. I love pop. It's horribly expensive, loaded with calories, and may as well be called liquid poison - it's SO bad for you! I want to quit cold turkey. I know it will be tough but it'll be worth it.
--Write our will. I want this to be finished by the end of January if at all possible. I was absolutely adamant about having this done as soon as Piper was born but it never happened. No more excuses - it has to get done. It's SO important and I don't want to put it off any longer.
--Keep up on my email "clutter". I've always been bad at this. My original hotmail account (I've had it for years and years) has over 18,000 unread emails. Yes, you read that right. Eighteen thousand *unread* emails. That's not even counting all my read emails! There is no getting on top of that account at this point but I recently had to get a new primary email account and I resolve to do better with this one. I need to delete what I don't need and organize the emails I want to save. No more email clutter!
--Wear my seat belt 100% of the time. I am a big time stickler for car seat safety where Piper is concerned. Yet, I'm not always buckled up. Hypocritical much? I always wear my belt when I'm driving, but as the passenger, I'd say I only wear it about 50% of the time. Not acceptable! I need to make it a habit to wear it every.single.time, without exception.
--Read at least one book per month. I know, I know. Wimpy goal, right? I have been slacking this year big time and it's time to get back to reading books again! I just ordered myself an Amazon Kindle with Christmas money so hopefully that will entice me to reach my goal. One book a month is easy, peasy. Maybe I'll get to the point of being able to read one a week with my new "toy"!
--Read the entire Bible. This is lofty and I'll admit that I'll be surprised if I actually complete this in one year. Mitchell and I have tried doing this several times but never seem to finish. I really want to get this completed this year! :)
--Learn to do one of three things: sew, knit, or play piano. I am leaning heavily towards learning to sew because it's most practical, but we shall see! First I have to find someone willing to teach me how to do it!
I'll have to revisit this entry every so often to see how I'm doing. I know chances are good that not all of my goals will be met, but I'm going to give it a valiant effort anyhow. I have high hopes for 2011. It sounds phony, but I have a really good feeling about what the coming year has in store for our little family.
I wish you all a happy, healthy new year!
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